Every Yard Needs One of These

If you've been to our house, you've probably seen the wind-bent pepper tree in the far corner of our side yard. You may not know that there was a tree very much like this one in the front yard of my childhood home in Pedley. That tree was different, however. It had a tree house, carefully constructed by the boy across the street and me. His name was Richard Isaac. He was a few years older than I and shortly after we finished the tree house, he lost interest in it. I did not. It was my fort, my hideaway, my resort and my thinking place. When I was sixteen, we moved away.

At the beginning of summer this year, I examined the tree in our yard here and decided it would be just right for my second tree house. I placed a couple of old two-by-fours in its lower branches, telling myself I'd get around to finishing the job after our family reunion in July. Whenever I'd pass by the tree in August or September or October, I'd remind myself that I ought to get working on it before Thanksgiving, and then here it was Christmas, and I hadn't done a thing on it.

Last Monday, my daughter Sara and her husband Brian brought their four kids to visit us for a week and share Christmas with us. On Tuesday, Brian spied the pepper tree and asked about the lumber he saw. I told him what I had intended to do. His eyes lit up, he grinned, and he said, "Let's do it!"

And do it he did! He surveyed, he measured, he cut and he nailed for two days.

Keaton and Shelby and Weston and Katie helped. My role was to supply the project with parts and tools.

We all love the finished product. Brian calls it his Christmas present. I call it my everything present!

SPOKT.com - For us and for you!

For the past few years, our large family has been using a fun website called SPOKT to stay in touch, on-line. Our son Dan and his friend Ron set up SPOKT so we all could have our own private little “hub” where each family shares news, photos and videos of each other. We also post recipes, book and movie reviews and family history. SPOKT is so popular with all of us that it is one of the first things we check whenever we log onto the Internet. If we are away for just a day, we often find dozens of new postings when we return. It has become a wonderful way for us to stay in touch. Most of our married kids have set up separate SPOKT hubs for their spouses' side of the family, too. Even our grandchildren have their own hub (monitored by Aunt Rachel). Unlike some of the big “social networking” sites, SPOKT hubs are private and they don’t bombard you with ads. In fact, they don't have any. There are free sites available, but for a very reasonable fee, you can get a lot more space.

We invite you to become a SPOKT-person, too. You will be happy you did. Click here to keep in touch with your family privately online. You'll be on your way to a closer family! What could be better?

Rules Made by Men ... for Women

The following was forwarded to me by someone to whom it had been forwarded by someone ... (you get the picture), but I found it so applicable that I chance posting it here:

(Please note... These rules are all numbered "1" 
on purpose)

1. Men are not mind readers.


1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
 You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
 You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

 


1. Crying is blackmail.



1. Ask for what you want. 
Let us be clear on this one: 
Subtle hints do not work.
 Strong hints do not work.
 Obvious hints do not work, 
Just say it.

1. "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.



1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. 
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.



1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. 
Don't ask us.



1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one 
.


1. You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done. 
Not both. 
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.



1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.



1. All men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
 Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color..Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.



1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.



1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. 
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 



1. When we have to go somewhere together, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really . 



1. You have enough clothes.



1. You have too many shoes.



1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!



1. Thank you for reading this.
 Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; 

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. 



Almost On Top of The World

On Monday this week, I replaced my four year old laptop computer because it had had developed some annoying and oppressive problems and was no longer reliable. It had become very slow and was randomly losing data, probably because the hard drive is full, and the compact disk /digital video disk drive wasn’t functioning. The new computer has a 13” display, better battery, faster processor, more memory and a much larger hard drive. It is also smaller and lighter than its predecessor:



The reason I mention this all this is that it seems to be a convenient segue to a notion I have that I may be far too dependent on these computing machines. I mean, as tools they are marvelous, but I believe I have become emotionally attached to mine. I do not notice this obsession until my computer fails to work right or does not work at all. Then I become morose and edgy, ill at ease and even slightly depressed. Am I really that tied to its data and document files? I suppose so, because I am feeling much better today. Now, just as soon as I can get the new Windows partition that my son Dan installed last night to recognize the new CD/DVD drive, I will be on top of the world!

Idyllic Interlude

Maureen and I spent a couple of hours at our beach late this afternoon, in our folding chairs, reading novels, while noisy waves washed the sand in the background and the sun began its daily descent into the western horizon. A black bird lit on my cap for a moment before realizing its mistake and flitting to the lawn in front of us. Half a dozen sea gulls eyed us patiently, several feet away from where we were seated, hoping, I suppose, for a late lunch from us. Two very small, brown-skinned children, one completely naked, splashed and frolicked in a large pool of salt water left behind by the receding tide. I love living near where the land and sea meet. The sound of the surf always seems to soothe my soul.

"Get Me Some Peanuts and Cracker Jacks!"

We found a message on our answering machine tonight - "Hi, Mom and Dad. This is Amy. Averey was just wondering if Cracker Jacks were invented when you guys were little. Were they around then?"

My Dear Averey, Yes, Craker Jacks were invented when we were little. They were a favorite treat. Every box used to have a nice prize inside, like toys, whistles, compasses and so forth. Cracker Jacks were also very popular at baseball games.





Cracker Jacks have been around since 1893 when a man named Frederick William Rueckheim (known to friends and family as "Fritzl") and his brother Louis sold it at the first Chicago World's Fair. At the time, it was a mixture of popcorn, molasses, and peanuts and was called "Candied Popcorn and Peanuts".

Cracker Jacks are older than us! Love, Grandpa and Grandma Hixon

Wand for Averey Michelle (Hermione) Foote

A few weeks ago our nine year-old granddaughter Averey visited us, along with her Dad and Mom, sisters and brother. During our Family Home Evening I gave her a small plastic baton to use while she led us in singing our opening and closing songs. The baton had been used by her grandmother a long time ago in a hymnology class at Brigham Young University. A couple of days later, Averey asked if I would make a wand for her. She didn't want to lead music with it ... she wanted to cast spells! She and her brother were playing "Harry Potter." I agreed. It took me several days to find an appropriate piece of vine wood, but I did, attached to the pepper tree in our back yard. I stripped the wood of its green bark, sanded and sealed it, and applied several coats of dark stain and protective varnish. The core is made of dragon heart strings, so it ought to work:

Just call me Mr. Olivander of Diagon Alley.

Spanking vs. Tough Love

This from a friend in England who specializes in parenting:

Most people think it improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my kids when they have one of 'those moments.' One that I found effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk. Some say it's the vibration from the car, others say it's the time away from any distractions such as TV, Video Games, Computer, IPod, etc. Either way, my kids usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our car ride together. Eye to eye contact helps a lot too. I've included a photo below of one of my sessions with my son, in case you would like to use the technique.

Lamp, Anyone?

So, I overheard the light of my life telling someone who was visiting our home (I can't remember whom) about one of our daughters and how she has decorated her home. With great pride she described one particular distinguishing feature of her interior design. It seems that Sara has a lamp on her kitchen counter. I would ordinarily have thought little of that, but I sensed in my wife's tone just a teensy bit of something like, "I would like to have a lamp on MY kitchen counter, but my kitchen is too small ..." Well, facilitator (enabler?) that I am, I remembered that I had an unused lamp in the garage, near my work bench. I retrieved it and placed it on my wife's kitchen counter.. We do too have room!

Cook And Serve Yourself? Really?

So ... here's a copy of the menu / placemat at a fun little steak house we found in Carpentaria, a couple of blocks from the ocean. We stopped there tonight on our way back to Santa Barbara after helping a daughter unpack moving boxes in her new home in Simi Valley. The food was great ... and you really do cook your own steak over a gas-fired grill next to the salad bar! The staff brings the  uncooked (raw?) meat to your table on a plate and from then on, you are on your own.  It was fun.

Well, Sashimi Me!

So ... this evening I dined on sushi/sashimi (for the first time). It was not just an appetizer, it was a full, main course meal. I had six California rolls, four tuna rolls and seven kinds of nigiri sushi: tuna, salmon, whitefish, albacore, shrimp, yellowtail and sako. Each bite was a delight, a new taste sensation. Thanks, Doug Westenskow, for the inspiration. 

No Soap!

I should have a picture, but I don't. Just know that taking a shower at my daughter Sara's house is a bit problematic if you are masculine. Her guest shower contains only three concoctions even remotely designed to clean dirt and grime from one's skin, none of which is labeled "soap." The first is called "Body Butter Apricot Scrub." Then there's "Fructus Fortifying Creme with Apricot and Avocado Oil."  And last, "Pink Grapefruit Mousse Hand Wash." It's like I fell into a large fruit cocktail! So long as Sara keeps stocking her showers with this stuff, I'm buying stock in Dole and Del Monte. 

C'est Cheese!

For my birthday in April, I received a gift card for a wonderful little store on Santa Barbara Street near De La Guerra that sells cheese! All kinds of mostly European cheeses. I love cheeses! Here are what's left of some great taste treats: Piave from Italy, Old Amsterdam from Holland, and Naked Goat from Geece (yes, naked.) Not pictured is a slab of coastal cheddar that I already consumed. Thank you!

Everything Except a Gun Rack and a Dog!

So I finally did it! Bought myself a pickup truck. Can't remember a time when I did not want one. This Toyota Tundra is three years old, and has a good paint job, nice wheels, a trailer hitch and a throaty exhaust. Now I can help people move in and out of our ward! What else could I want? Oh, I dunno ... maybe something to pull with that hitch? How about a little fishing boat to take up to Lake Cachuma? Or a 20' travel trailer to haul up to Refugio State Beach? Or Big Sur? Or Silver Fox RV Park! 

That's How I Roll

For years my wife has been trying to teach me to load our toilet paper so that it rolls toward you over the top. Since there is no logical reason for that, as opposed to having it roll away from you toward the wall, I often forget or don't think about it, and load it the "wrong" way. Post-it notes have not worked, nor have verbal reminders. Last week she found a way to get my attention.

Much Ado About Something

Whoever said retirement means rest and leisure was never retired. I have been "retired" for five years (yep, since June 2004) and my weekly "To Do" lists still fill most of a page. My electronic version on Google will only allow me to list 13 items, so I have reverted to pen and paper and a clipboard that I carry around the house and yard. I made this list three days ago. I have completed 14 of the 32 chores, tasks and projects all begging to be done. (Only one of these was penciled in by my spouse!, the rest are mine.) The marvelous thing is that I walked around our property yesterday and found seven more jobs ... but I didn't have my clipboard, so they are still in my head, awaiting memorialization or something like that. It is great to be busy. But it is also great not to have to report for work at a certain time at a certain place. It is nice to have a small amount of discretion as to when things have to be done! I like being retired!

Ribs

So, we enjoyed pork spare ribs for our Memorial Day meal. I only wish I had also taken a picture three hours after this one ... when the ribs were a mouth-watering golden bronze. They tasted great!

Expired but Not Forgotten

My UK driving licence expired on my birthday a few days ago. I have carried it since returning from England because it was rather hard to come by. In the United Kingdom an American citizen may legally drive on the driver license (notice the spelling differences) issued by his or her state of residence for one year after entering the country. In the England Manchester Mission the senior couples from the US would travel to the Isle of Man (a sovereign nation within the mission boundaries) just before their year was up and thus restart the 12-month clock, thus avoiding the need to obtain a UK licence. About a year after Maureen and I arrived in the mission field, the Church's local legal guys decided that our little loophole wasn't legal after all, so we all began the process of getting a new licence. This involved driving lessons, passing a written exam and passing a driving test. The process takes about three months and costs about $500. Two of the men in our mission failed their tests and couldn't drive anymore. I was the first successful candidate; our mission president was the second. He gave me a high-five when I got mine; I gave him one when he got his.

So I Guess I Am Old

Grandson Keaton Steck had a spelling test a few weeks ago. He was to use his spelling words in sentences. His words were "old," "fold," "told," and "cold." For the first word, he wrote: "My Grapa is verry old" (sic). I celebrated my 70th birthday yesterday, so I guess the kid isn't too far off in his estimate of me. (btw: as of yesterday, my definition of old moved out a bit. It was 75; now it is 95! ' Except for a little of what my rheumatologist calls "overlap syndrome," I am feeling pretty good (well, when I take extra strength Tylenol, that is).

Picnic in the Park

Our tummies began rumbling as we passed through the sleepy town of Clairemont this afternoon on our way to Provo, so we asked our GPS to find us a place to have a picnic. Here is the place she picked out ... less than a mile from the I-210 and practically deserted. We enjoyed forty minutes of pleasant solitude AND a yummy meal prepared by my sweetie: roast turkey, avocado and cheese sandwiches, chips, and a tomato. (I ate the tomato; Mo ate the chips.) A man could not have a better wife!

Time to Rest ... again

So here's where we decided to spend the night on our way to Provo. I think the last time we were here was back in, maybe, 1978 ... before the Winnebago. The young man doing the desk clerk job tonight did not remember us. Oh, well. We are having fun anyway

Time to Plant

Last year my son Roger furnished a day's worth of hard labor in helping me ready my 8' x 8' x 2' vegetable garden. This year all I have to do is transfer my fall and winter compost pile into the box, till the soil, reinstall my sleek irrigation system and plant the seeds. Here's me rototilling the compost pile and moving it to the box. And here's a picture of our seed packets after we opened the storage can: corn, peas, beans, turnips, radishes, squash and rutabaga!

A Time to Rest

So my hammock always call to me on a warm and sunny afternoon, especially after I have spent a few hours wrestling with my rototiller in my vegetable garden, making the garden plot ready for planting tomorrow or the next day.

An Angel in the House

I was awakened this morning by an insistent, but gentle tugging on my elbow. I opened one sleepy eye and beheld the smiling face of a small, almost six year-old angel, urging her grandpa to wake up and play with her. It was Jenna Kay Murphy, who had come to our house yesterday with two other cousins, Clara and Olivia Hixon, to stay a few days with us this week while Clara and Olivia's mom is in Texas attending a wedding. I tried to explain to Jenna that I wanted to return to my dream (a ploy to linger in bed longer), but my protest availed me nothing. Oh, well ... by now both eyes were open and I could see that it was a beautiful day. Thanks to my Jenna for helping me enjoy it.

What Do You Do With Granddaughters?

You take them to the beach and to the carousel and you let the almost eight year-old make quesadilla's for your lunch and you let them build a train station with blocks and you watch them celebrate Barbie's 50th anniversary! In short, you have a grand time and you love them a lot.

Visiting the Lake District

Yesterday my sweetheart and I drove up the San Marcos Pass Road on our way to the Santa Ynez Valley to see what we had been told was a profusion of spring wild flowers. We were disappointed in the flowers there ... there are more here than there, but we did stop at a vista point overlooking Lake Cachuma and ate a picnic lunch Maureen had packed. After the recent rains, the lake is full to the brim and is a beautiful site to behold. When the weather warms a bit, I am going back for a day of fishing. While there I startled four deer and took aother picture of one dear (with her cane).

Spring is Just Around the Corner

We went for a walk today, like we do everyday, but today it was between rain showers and I remembered to grab my camera. Here are some pictures of our daffodils, a rose, some California Poppies, some Lupine, and a lovely small white flower whose name we do not yet know. Everything not under cultivation around our town is green and lush from last month's storms. Some of the grass is more than waist high. My lime tree is bedecked with white blossoms, heralding another bountiful harvest this year. And I spied a few buds on my plum tree, too!

Aren't Old Friends The Greatest!

Here are Claire and Julia Hopkins and that's Hearst Castle behind us. These folks hail from Salt Lake City and were our best friends in England when we all served missions there. They were C.E.S. Missionaries and we were the Office Couple. They worked nights and we worked days, but we got together on week-ends for food, fun and games. Julia is a great cook, as good as Maureen, as so we always ate well. They came to see us this week, arriving Monday afternoon and departing Thursday morning. We showed them our beautiful city and its attractions. They seemed quite impressed with our fair weather. We thoroughly enjoyed having them here.

I Finally Like Pizza!

Okay ... for all my life until two days ago I have not particularly liked pizza. I never saw the point of stuffing one's face with burnt bread slathered with cheese and marinara sauce. And I detested pepperoni.  Something strange happened earlier this week. I began thinking about a slice of pizza. Not just any slice, but one with sausage and ham and pepperoni, and bell peppers and sliced olives and onions and three kinds of cheese! The more I thought about it, the more my body began to yen for this slice of pizza. What was happening? This was absurd, but very pervasive.  So, later that evening, as Maureen and I completed some errands, I suggested we go out to dinner. She agreed. I found myself saying, "Let's go to Luigi's!" She agreed! And I ordered a whole medium combination, everything on it, pizza. And it was delicious. I like pizza. But I will never, ever like potato chips or peanuts!

Makin' A Connection - The IRA Way

It is no secret that the love of my life celebrated birthday Number 70 last September. That means she turns 70-1/2 in 2009, and that means she is required by the IRS to begin making minimum withdrawals from her IRA (Individual Retirement Account). She also considers anything related to the IRS (including IRA's, LTCG's, AMT's, AGI, and so forth) to be exclusively my domain. So I initiated the withdrawal process today by calling our investment adviser at BAIS (Banc of America Investment Services). Yes, it's now Banc, not Bank, and I don't know when or why. She was not in (never is), but gave me a voice message telling me to ring up Customer Service. There a taped message asked me to enter Maureen's account number. I did. Another taped message advised me that it could take up to four minutes for a live human to pick up.  The elevator music was not too bad, but it was not memorable, either. About 40 seconds later, a young-sounding man with a eastern seaboard accent greeted me and asked how he could help me today. Friendly guy. I told him and gave him all the account numbers. He asked if my wife was nearby. He needed to talk to her to verify that she was really who I said she was. She was in the back room doing ironing. So she and this young man talked for awhile, and then Maureen handed the phone back to me to work out the details of the transaction. Then the guy said he'd like to speak to Maureen again to get her approval for all this. 

Now comes the good part. When they were done, I guess he asked her if there was anything else he could do for her today. I suppose I would have said, "No, thank you" or something like that. My wife said, "You could come and finish my ironing."  I'll bet dollars to doughnuts he's never had a response like that! Then I guess he said he'd love to do that, but he'd have to come all the way across the country.  Maureen asked him where he was. He said, "Boston." She said, "Oh, I'll bet its a lot colder where you are than where we are." He agreed, and told her he loved Santa Barbara ... was married there, in fact. "Where?" she asked. "At a ranch on Highway 154," he answered. She said she knew where the highway was, but not the ranch. 

What this means is ... I have the world's friendliest person for my wife. She makes anyone, even a BAIS customer service representative who is closing out her IRA,  feel completely at ease. Most of the time she can also learn how she is related to the person in about three minutes. It happens all the time. She is wonderful!